Funny how you thought you know a person really well then that person turned out to be living a double life with double standards, more like a doppelganger.
18 years ago, I met this girl in school. We became friends. I shared with her my life, my story, my joy and my tears. I thought the friendship will last. I was wrong. We had fights back then, petty fights, but we patched things up easily. I shared with her secrets because I trusted her, because she's my friend. I've already been warned about her, but I didn't pay attention. I thought I couldn't just throw away 18 years of friendship. Besides, she's just misunderstood... Or so I thought. BIG MISTAKE!
The past few months I've come to realize so many things. Now it seems like my eyes were suddenly opened. Now I see her true colors. Now it is clear that we are not in any way the same; that we really didn't have anything in common except that we went to the same school back in college; that she didn't have anything good to say about anyone - her family, her daughter, her closest "friends"... including myself. Now I see her life as it is - full of lies, friendships that had gone sour, immoral relationships...
The sad thing is it took me 18 long years to realize how toxic this "friendship" is.
9 comments:
As you get older, I think you see people more quickly for who the really are right from the beginning of a relationship. But *friendships* that are formed when you're younger, are sometimes more difficult to dissect. Growing apart, or realizing you just really have nothing in common with them, is sometimes disappointing, but a reality of life, and sometimes it's better to just let it go and move on. Especially when the relationship is toxic. :-| We're all had a few of those!
I'm sorry to hear that, Pia.
I've ever had that experience. Sometimes building a relationship is hurt, but we could always learn from that to make a better preparation and building the next relationship.
have an amazing day!
The Holy Spirit has given us the Spirit of wisdom, knowledge and understanding and the Spirit of discernment to see with the eyes of our hearts who are the true children of God and followers of Jesus Christ. But the enemy sometimes blinds us to the true colors of some of our friends. That is why it is so important to be always Spirit filled to avoid falling into the trap of the enemy. Thanks for the post. God bless you always.
I'm kinda sorry to say that I totally understand...
They say hindsight is 20/20, and it's strange and sad that I can think back over some of my friendships and see all kinds of reasons why I should not have continued that friendship. But I did, and I was hurt by those people.
Don't worry, though. I have other friends who have been much more steadfast. Today I don't have a whole lot of friends but I think I like it that way - I have a small group of friends who I now know that I can have total confidence in. Sad, though, that it took me so many poor friendships to teach me which ones are good.
I'm so sorry you had to go through this Pia. I fairly recently had a friendship turn VERY bad. I'm just glad for the opportunity to have learned from the mistakes. I hope you heal quickly!
i do believe that there must be a reason why it's only now that i've seen the reality of this so called friendship. i believe that there's a right timing for everything. i must admit that somehow i've already seen some promising trouble in this friendship but i just shrugged it off. i ignored it. then it happened. i guess if i detached myself earlier, i would have probably be sulking for the lost of this friendship. but now i don't have any remorse feeling whatsoever for moving on with my life without her. let me just put it this way, i have to let her go because she's pulling me down with her. i also believe that in God's right timing and perfect way, her eyes will also be opened. then she can fix her life and move on.
thank you for sharing your thoughts about friendships, about your own experiences.
God bless y'all. ☺
hmmm, i can relate to this. happened to me before, and it's really sad no.
so sad to know about that.it's just part of your life.so called friends come and go.embrace those who are true to you and forget the ones that are rotten.
I can easily throw people who are not true to me as they are not worth keeping my treasure box.
the good thing Pia, is that you saw it. thank God that He doesn't have us to be ignorant of satan's devices. this is what happens in so many men-women relationships. we see things initially, but ignore them for one reason or another. the good thing is we finally see, and then we have that wisdom and knowledge for future relationships. we see and hear the warning signs and move on earlier. thank God for growth.
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